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| Martyrs, Heretics and Innocents |
By Sue Jamieson
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Much as artists identify artistic potential in all things they sense and intuit in both ordinary and non-ordinary reality, and much as musicians experience the rhythm of music in all things, I recognize healing in all things. I unendingly examine the internal and external environments searching for the healing potential.
Some time ago, I was asked to participate in presenting a workshop. The theme that we were given was “Martyrs and Heretics: Our Legacy and our Lives”. The words martyr and heretic had been chosen because they were “words where fear and the struggle for authenticity meet - fertile soil for blockages and their stories.” The journey to health and wholeness is a process of self-discovery; discovering the “story” of self. It is the search for meaning, purpose, reasons for being. It is a process of making sense out of our existence.
In researching material for the workshop, I was intrigued by the changes in the meanings of the words heretic and martyr that, in their current usage, evoke a response and an image of negativity for most of us. Martyr in its current sense has several meanings. A martyr is a person who prefers to suffer or die rather than give up his/her faith or principles. A person who suffers great pain or misery for a long time or a person who assumes an attitude of self-sacrifice or suffering in order to arouse feelings of pity or guilt in others, may be termed a martyr. As a verb martyr means to persecute, to torture, to make suffer greatly.
Pretty grim stuff. However according to Webster, the root meanings of martyr were “to remember”, “to care”, “to be mindful”, “to be a witness”, from the word “witan” - “to know”.
Similarly, a heretic is a person who holds an opinion contrary to the generally accepted or established opinion. Heretic evokes images of being tortured, killed, or exiled for holding such opinions. Heretic, according to Webster, formed its roots from “to be able to choose”; “to choose”; “to take”.
To care, to remember, to be mindful are states of nurturing and awareness. To choose is to embrace empowerment. As a victim, we are powerless. As a victimizer, we are in a state of quasi-power. Being at “choice” in a mindful, nurturing, caring manner toward ourselves and others allows us to fully embrace our power with responsibility and purpose. Much as the words heretic and martyr have lost their original meanings and accumulated their own “baggage” and “stories” over the course of time, so have we given up our power, accumulated baggage, created stories about ourselves, suffered a loss of innocence and lost sight of who we truly are.
We have all been hurt, scarred, wounded, misunderstood. We have all hurt, scarred, wounded and misunderstood others. We have tortured ourselves and others with perceived inadequacies. We have let our dreams and our hopes “die” and we have “killed” the hopes and dreams of others. We have been victims. We have been victimizers. We have, each and every one of us, believed that we were doing the very best that we could under the circumstances. We probably were in terms of who we thought we were… in terms of the stories we believed about ourselves.
We can, indeed need to, become martyrs and heretics in the original sense of the words. We must “be mindful”, “be aware”, “care about”, “remember”, and “know” ourselves. We must “be a witness” to our own growth and well-being. We must recognize and assume our responsibility and power “to choose” how we write and live our lives. We must return to our state of innocence.
In her book, Women Who Run With The Wolves, Clarissa Pinkola Estes, PhD., notes that the word innocent is often used to mean a person of no knowing, or a simpleton, but the roots of the word mean to be free of injury or hurt. She continues that to be innocent really means to be able to see clearly what is the matter and then mend it.
We need to look at ourselves, see what is the matter, and mend it. How? We must first look at ourselves and recognize and appreciate that we are body/mind/spirit beings. We cannot separate and compartmentalize our mind, our body, or our spirit (e.g. soul, life force, essence.)
Medical research is providing scientific evidence to support the common sense, anecdotally supported evidence that our feelings, thoughts, attitudes and moods are mirrored in the functioning of the body. Numerous studies have shown that the feelings of anger and fear, depression, frustration, despair, and helplessness produce negative changes in the body's chemistry. Studies suggest that the positive emotions - love, hope, joy - provide a buffer against stress. There is no such thing as a purely psychological event or a purely physical event. They are inseparable. Why?
A human body is an assemblage of approximately 100 trillion cells. Every cell has a universal pattern of intelligence labeled DNA (deoxyribonucleic acid.) There are at least six billion steps of DNA in a single cell. DNA acts as a pattern for RNA (ribonucleic acid). RNA's mission is to produce the proteins (more than two million in number) that build and repair the body. DNA is the blueprint, the intelligence; RNA is the builder, the active knowledge. Psychoneuroimmunology (PNI) is the study of the connections among the brain, the endocrine system, and the immune system. Researchers have determined that neuropeptides, sometimes referred to as the bio-chemicals of the emotions, coordinate the functions of the brain, glands, and immune system.
Deepak Chopra in his book, Quantum Healing, states that we may not think we can talk to our DNA, but, in fact, we continually do so. For instance, how often do we say “I'm sick and tired of…” or “I'm dying of…” or “I'm no good at…” or “I'm scared to death about…”. How often do we hear “You're worthless, lazy, selfish, inadequate.” We continually write our stories. We yearn to love and be loved, but are tortured by our “not lovable”, “not enough”, “not worthy” stories. We yearn to be “more”, but out stories tell us that we cannot. We hurt. We stay “stuck”. We suffer a loss of innocence.
As children, we were taught that “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” We tried to comfort ourselves with this old adage as the tears rolled down our faces, and our hands balled up into fists, and our stomachs knotted in pain. We tried to reconcile this lie with the truth of our pain. Viscerally we knew that words, thoughts, can and do hurt. We felt it.
The origination of a thought is the mind/spirit. Inspiration and Knowing occur at the level of spirit in the body/mind/spirit self which can then be translated into a thought. Thinking happens (manifests) at the level of DNA. Without the brain cell sending out a neuropeptide or other messenger, there can be no thought. Thought is physically manifested throughout the body. Every thought, every feeling, every emotion we experience impacts and is recorded in cellular memory. The depth and the strength of the message that is received by the cell is determined by the intensity of the feeling associated with it. Our bodies then “out-picture” our stories in our reactions and in the ways in which we move and carry ourselves.
Cellular memory (i.e. our life experiences and the stories that we have told ourselves and heard from others) is automatically and unconsciously referred back to. Cellular memory thereby governs our beliefs and attitudes, which then directs our behavior. Our behaviors further reinforce our attitudes and beliefs. Round and round we go in circles of confusion and suffering. As we think, so we become and as we become, so we think. Descartes' philosophical statement, “I think, therefore, I am”, refers to “proof of existence” by means of the ability to think. I believe a broader meaning, however, is the energetic ability to create and manifest, to become. (energy=spirit/ create=mind/ manifest=body)
Feelings and thoughts are energy. Feelings and thoughts are matter. Energy/matter cannot be destroyed, but it can be altered. Feelings and thoughts can be changed, thereby affecting changes in the body and, ultimately, our behavior and well-being. We can rethink, rewrite our stories.
An exploration of our fears and our stories of martyrdom and heresies can assist us in our discovery of self and move us toward authenticity. Through exploring our suffering, through exploring the ways in which we have been “tortured”, “killed”, or “exiled”, we can facilitate healing. We can bring the story of self into focus. We can examine, modify, change our thoughts that determine our beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors and, ultimately, change our experience of living. Moving through our fears and into authenticity requires courage, commitment, and compassion. Responsible thought requires vigilance and work. Becoming martyrs, heretics, and innocents in their original sense of being at “choice” in nurturing, mindful, awareness has powerful potential in our processes of healing.
References:
Molecules of Emotion: Why You Feel the Way You Feel
Candace B. Pert, Ph.D.
Scribner, 1997
Women Who Run With the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype
Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph.D.
Ballantine Books, 1995
Quantum Healing: Exploring the Frontiers of Mind/Body Medicine
Deepak Chopra, M.D.
Bantam Books, 1990
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